
Skull of Valentine
Yes, I know, we have enough sappy stuff about Valentine’s Day. But did you know this day originally had nothing to do with romance? It was a Catholic holiday in honor of St. Valentine, they are not sure which one. Legend has 3 of them, all martyred. The original was Valentine of Rome who was martyred in 269 AD. The flower crowned skull of St. Valentine is exhibited in the Basilica of Santa Maria in Cosmedin, Rome. That sounds real romantic.
It wasn’t until the poem about love birds written by Chaucer in 1382 that romance started its association. There are other various traditions about lovers during the 14th century.
That brings us to today. I think Valentine’s Day is the last big push for card, candy and flower sellers before the dreaded tax day comes and make everyone poor. I know not much romance there.
Seriously, romance and love do play a large part in our society. But it seems that in our day and age, it is more often infatuated love that takes the forefront. Hollywood really pushes this; fall in love, fall out of love. Sex is involved at every stage. When you get bored, you find someone else. I don’t know about you, but to me that is just plain gross.
I have been married now for almost 16 years. When I first “fell” in love with my wife, there was a lot of sexual attraction as well. We were in love. . . We hadn’t lived together, didn’t see each other after throwing up, or first thing in the morning. We didn’t have arguments about anything. The kids were perfect and we didn’t think twice of driving 45 minutes to see each other for 20 minutes.
Now fast forward 15 years. Do we have the same kind of intense love for each other that we did 15 years ago? Yes and no. We have now seen each other at our worst. We have had issues with all the kids at one point or another. We have been sick, broke, upset and worried.
What happened to the intense love we started with? That early love was bottled up and concentrated. Once we popped the cork, it flowed out. What was intense at first and spread over everything. Think of it as perfumed oil. In the bottle everyone can smell it. Poured out onto a porous surface, it soaks in and coats it all. It is still there, but now it covers everything. Yes, it is thinner, yes the odor is not as strong, but it has soaked in. The lives it penetrates are stronger for it. That kind of love can stand up to the harsh elements of the world.
It is that kind of love that is giving and honest, unselfish and real. It is the kind of love little girls hope to find when they grow up.
So, today, if you have that kind of love in your life, honor that. It may not be the traditional candy and flowers. It may be time together, romance (that doesn’t just mean sex, guys), hand holding and nearness.
Today I honor the one I love from the bottom of my heart. She isn’t my inferior, whom I have to lord over and control, she isn’t my superior, whom I have to fear. She is my partner, whom I stand side by side with and get to love and cherish.
This blog is about the life of a writer. Well guys, I would not be much of a writer or much of a man without the love of my wife. What do I owe her? My life and all I have.
Happy Valentine’s Day

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